Do you ever think “How come everyone else seems to have it all together?” or “All I want to do today is pull the covers over my head and hide!” You’re not the only one struggling to find grace in the midst of the chaos.
You know chaos. The everyday stuff of life.
“I’ll look up Antarctic mammals with her while cooking dinner. After you finish your assignment, can you supervise bath time while calling so & so? Thanks, because I have to leave for that meeting in 45 minutes.” Then there is the “I forgot my lunch” and the “Have you got time to chat?” moments.
Life is wonderfully full and we as a family are trying to hear and follow the call of God on our life. But, for a long time I tried to control the chaos that was our life.
I remember thinking to myself, “I love God and I’m trying my best. Why am I exhausted and feeling like a failure?” I didn’t have the answer and I was ashamed to admit that to anyone. I asked God to show me how to fix this feeling of being overwhelmed and disillusioned but I couldn’t wait to hear the answer.
Like the warning light on the dashboard I knew something wasn’t right but I ignored it. So I hid these thoughts behind busyness. I just had to try harder to get it together. Up early and still going late into the night, it felt like the “to do” list continued to mocked me. One Friday I had a coffee with my Mum and had a complete and spectacular meltdown over everything my husband wasn’t doing right and how I was over it all.
After ignoring that warning light for far too long my spirit finally stalled. Exhausted, I went home and cried out to God. He spoke to me about grace. And the illustration He used was, of all things, marriage.
As a “doer” I have always struggled with the concept of grace. Marriage though, I get. I understand faithfulness, commitment, sacrifice, expectations. I’ve also experienced joy, love, contentment, purpose and unity that comes from being in a relationship with my husband.
Then it hit me that these are the same words to describe my relationship with God. Just as I am in a covenant of marriage with my husband, so I’m in a covenant of grace with God.
From the outside some people can give you the impression that marriage is just hard work, but when you have experienced it for yourself you also know how amazing it can be. And so it is with grace. Grace is God choosing to do life with us when we don’t deserve it. He loves us even when we aren’t faithful in our relationship with him. I had been so focused on controlling the chaos that I had forgot God’s grace is what makes all the difference.
So how does grace effect my chaos filled life? There is grace for each and every day because God is with me. The chaos is still there, but now I understand so is God. Just like in my marriage, I know I’m loved so I don’t need to be perfect or have everything in my life perfect. God’s faithfulness isn’t based on my performance.
Rather than changing the chaos God has changed me. When the chaos feels like it is getting out of control I don’t have to fix it. I run instead to God for advice and solutions and strength to do it all. He helps me get perspective on the focus for my day.
God’s grace is amazing because it is there for each one of us.
Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16
From angle of grace, chaos doesn’t look like failure. Chaos looks like adventure. If life feels like you are two breaths away from total chaos meltdown, then its time to stop and seek his grace. Ask God today for his grace to still your heart, change your responses and show you a way forward.
How do you stop and find his grace when you need it?
Julie Willis-Jones and her husband Trefor are aiming to raise three kids to become relatively normal and amazing people, in the beautiful city of Newcastle, Australia. In the midst of daily chaos and grace, Julie loves God, family, photography, cooking, meaningful art and homewares, and coffee with friends. Julie & Trefor also run their business, Complete Transformation, which helps people find wholeness from life controlling issues such as sexual abuse. To find out how you can overcome, or how you can support someone through this process, find us on Facebook. You can also connect with Julie personally on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter.
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